Introducing The Cum Shots
Introducing The Cumshots
Words by Ian Dickinson
If you are looking for up lifting look else where. If you are looking for terrifying and tragic doused in liters of whiskey and venom, you are in the right place. Please allow me to introduce The Cumshots.
Normally an Introducing piece is based on a band that have only been around for a short period of time. The Cumshots have been around since 1999, unless you are from Norway, Germany or the Netherlands the likely hood is that you have not heard of them. The Norwegian quintet have recently released their fourth album A Life Less Necessary and consist of Max Cargo (lead vocals), El Doom, (guitar, vocals), Freddie Tennessee (guitar), Tommy Dean (bass) and Chris Bartender (drums). Do not be misled by the band name, this is not a joke band, far from it. The age old analogy of never judge a book by its cover has never been so accurate than in relation to The Cumshots. The name, the song titles, the image would lead one to the assumption that they are slapstick extreme metal act, devoid of emotion, melody or lyrical content. All would be incorrect. The Cumshots are menacing, they are brutal but there is a maniacal melody and sinister soul to their music. When Cargo screams “I am sorry, SORRY!” on the track I Still Drink Alone, the sequel to I Drink Alone from their 2006 release, it is moving and brutally sincere. This is a band with more than their fair share of demons and they have decided to unleashed them upon the world.
The best way to describe The Cumshots music would be to list their influences. Take Motorhead, Slayer and Elvis add a drop of absinthe and you get Death ’n’ Rollers The Cumshots. Killer riffs and tear wrenching melodies they cover all aspects in the production of hard rocking emotional mayhem. This is not a one dimensional band. Strings and Piano’s accompany the rock staples, providing a more diverse sound that heightens the intensity of Cargo’s overtly personal lyrics. Even bands that I like sometimes grow tiresome when trying to get through an entire album. This is not the case with The Cumshots current release. There are the snotty, guttural tracks such as What Bleeds Must Be Butchered and the grand melodic tracks like Existence Should Be Singing, an eight minute epic that Baroness would be proud of. Lyrically the band fear no subject. The more controversial the better. This is not born (entirely) out of a desire to offend but due to a nihilistic approach to issues. Why shouldn’t you be able to discuss cancer? Why shouldn’t you be able to discuss incest or religion? This is a band that will offend, but they will not be compromised or limited by societies conservatism.
Cargo is a jack of all trades and something of a celebrity in his native country, hosting radio shows, television shows (he had a show in which he travelled around the world committing all the seven deadly sins. This made him very unpopular with certain people in Norway) writing comic books and generally pissing people off. He has even sold his soul on Ebay. He is a physically intimidating man and this menace even transcends speakers and headphones. A man with one arm in a straight jacket and another clutching a bottle of vodka. He is literally chilling at times as he barks and snarls through tracks like a monstrous lunatic; “We all have our demons fighting sobriety…i’m sorry mum I still drink alone.” It is his ability to cut even the hardest heart down with his personal and introspective lyrics, that most would fear the world to hear. Cargo embraces this and uses it to his advantage and has created aggressive and beautiful music.
The Cumshots are not here to make friends. They are nasty, sleazy, heartbreaking suns of bitches. They will make you want to drink, fight, cry and fight some more. Violent and harrowing The Cumshots are utterly intoxicating. If that wasn’t enough they play skull crushing metal that will appeal to any one who enjoys giant riffs and ear bursting drums. I will certainly be making sure I get to see them on their next visit to the UK in support of fellow booze hounds Viking Skull. In 2004 The Cumshots were involved in some rather sticky legal matters after a couple had sex onstage during one of their shows. Members of the band have also been known to come off stage with broken limbs. It should be an interesting show to say the least. So go get the album, go get a bottle of whiskey a pack of smokes and get involved with the chilling sounds of The Cumshots.
Oh and one last thing, good luck Google searching them!
October 16th, 2009
Was at my first cumshots consert in 1999 and have seen them perform several times after that. They have just gotten better and better through the years. Max (the lead singer) is as stated in the rewiev (witch was very good btw) a famous tv and radio personality in Norway. But this band and his part in it has nothing to do with that. The cumshots is a gritty, to the core filthy deathrock band that delivers 100% every time they take the stage. Expect mayhem, expect blood and chaos.