Them Crooked Vultures at The Apollo

Them Crooked Vultures – Hammersmith Apollo – 17 December 2009

Support: Sweethead

Words by Ian Dickinson / Photo’s by Daniel Gray

When it was first mentioned in 2005 that Dave Grohl (Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Probot), Josh Homme (Queens Of The Stoneage, Desert Sessions) and John Paul Jones (Led Zeppelin) were planning on forming a band, most of the music world became nothing short of sexually aroused. In 2009 with plenty of hype and expectation Them Crooked Vultures (TCV) landed. In all honesty I was a little disappointed with the album. This is in no way detracted from the my excitement about seeing TCV live. Its not often that you get to see such legends on stage at the same time. Whether this band slapped their testicles on midgets heads for an hour and a half, people would still pay for the privilege and many people would revere what ever music they create. For all their musical prowess and status tonight was not quit what I dreamt of.

Its snowing heavily. All the bars and pubs within a mile radius are chocked full of Christmas revealers and excited fans consuming vast quantities of alcohol before the dream team take to the stage. I am excited at the prospect of a snow day tomorrow, as well as the gig obviously. The Hammersmith Apollo is rammed. A glance at the fans gives you a general idea of the bands musical diversity. Guys in their 50s-60s, young Foo Fighter fans and leather clad, bearded piss heads have all come in from the cold and into what could possibly be one of the finest performances they will ever witness.

The night gets kicking with true rock n roll swagger as the enigmatic Sweethead take to the stage. Many in the audience seem unaware of who Sweethead are but it comes as no surprise that they are supporting Them Crooked Vultures as Sweethead is the latest side project of Queens Of The Stoneage guitarist Troy Van Leeuwen. So theres the connection if anyone was wondering. This is not to say that the band are only here due to there connections. They are unbelievably cool and lead singer Serrina Sims shimmers as the bands sexy pin up siren. Her vocals are harsher live than the studio recordings and this really adds to the bands overall menace. I will certainly be looking out for a more intimate setting to enjoy Sweethead as there music is ideal for the those dark and sinister nights of excess.

As each member of Them Crooked Vultures takes to the stage the applause is rapturous and I am filled with a genuine sense of elation that these musical greats are here to play for us. Seriously, Nirvana, Led Zeppelin and Queens Of The Stoneage, these are significantly influential bands that have and will stand the test of time. It is easy to become sycophantic and utterly start struck. John Paul Jones receives the biggest applause. The lesser known Vulture, Alaine Johannes (check out this guys CV, it is impressive!) accompanies the band when playing live on rhythm guitar. TCV open with No One Loves Me And Neither Do I. My favorite track from the album and probably the best of the night. This was the highlight of the evening for me, apart from sporadic moments of musical magnificence. After this the songs have a tendency to be of a muchness. It is only the change of guitar for Jones and Homme after every track that really signals the beginning of a new tune.

Apart from a few tracks, the set blends into one continuous and unvaried sound for the general listener. I am sure a hardcore musician would be in a technical utopia but for me it becomes staggeringly tedious. Every few moments something spectacular will smash you in the ears and then it disappears again. Homme’s vocals are instantly recognizable. Dust in throat, low, eerie croon is creepy, harrowing and romantic but fails to consume the venue. His sleazy lounge room style is more at home in a dimly lit club. Homme is enigmatic and suitably smashed as he swigs from a rather large bottle of something potent. By the end it begins to show. He is given a cake before by an adoring fan and in turns gives the fan a swig from “Daddy’s medicine” as he calls it. I can’t tell whether it is a joke or not but Homme comments that Grohl has just told him to watch his drinking. Grohl steals the show completely. He looks like a barbarian pounding away on his gigantic drum set and is hands down the finest drummer I have had the pleasure of seeing live. John Paul Jones take to the piano at one point which is utterly sublime. Always the dull one in Led Zeppelin he certainly isn’t anymore. Josh puts his guitar down for one track which is a surreal, as he minces around the stage and does something resembling the Hula.

It is incredible to see these men on stage together and at times they create the most intense and intoxicating music, but every now and again there obvious love of playing together becomes too much as they go off on into their own world. They play a long set and you definitely got your moneys worth.

As controversial as this may sound that this was not the best gig of my life. TCV are not the best band in the world. Brilliant at times but lacking tracks that really capture you. I am in awe of all of these musicians as individuals and at times as a collective. I think many music fans looked to TCV in the same way as Christians do the second coming. The expectations of the fans was almost impossible to match. Don’t get me wrong at times the music created on stage was genuinely mind blowing, Grohl was spectacular and Homme was every part the drunk, charismatic, front man but sadly the intensity and pace wasn’t upheld through out, there was a self indulgence that just couldn’t be ignored.